Mark Twain's letter to the "most ignorant person now alive on the planet"

Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain) sent the following letter to J. H. Todd, a salesman who had just attempted to sell phony patent medicine to him. Mr. Todd had sent a letter and advertisement to the Clemens’ home. According to the advertisement, the "medicine" in question, called "The Elixir of Life", could cure ailments such as meningitis, which had killed Clemens' daughter in 1896, and diphtheria, which killed his 19-month-old son. Clemens, in ill health at the time and very recently widowed, was understandably furious.  He dictated this reply to his secretary, signing it with his famous alias.   

Samuel Clemens aka Mark Twain

Nov. 20. 1905

J. H. Todd  
1212 Webster St.
San Francisco, Cal.

Dear Sir,

Your letter is an insoluble puzzle to me. The handwriting is good and exhibits considerable character, and there are even traces of intelligence in what you say, yet the letter and the accompanying advertisements profess to be the work of the same hand. The person who wrote the advertisements is without doubt the most ignorant person now alive on the planet; also without doubt he is an idiot, an idiot of the 33rd degree, and scion of an ancestral procession of idiots stretching back to the Missing Link. It puzzles me to make out how the same hand could have constructed your letter and your advertisements. Puzzles fret me, puzzles annoy me, puzzles exasperate me; and always, for a moment, they arouse in me an unkind state of mind toward the person who has puzzled me. A few moments from now my resentment will have faded and passed and I shall probably even be praying for you; but while there is yet time I hasten to wish that you may take a dose of your own poison by mistake, and enter swiftly into the damnation which you and all other patent medicine assassins have so remorselessly earned and do so richly deserve.

Adieu, adieu, adieu!

Mark Twain

Click here to see an image of the original note and more information

For more interesting letters of note, click here.

"Mama's Cooking Blog 2055: Avocado Steak"

 Before Ethan, the greatest genetic engineering feat of all times had been the creation of the avocado steak -- 
a guilt-free meat analog.

Avocados, rich in health-benefiting mono-unsaturated fatty acids, seemed like the logical choice when scientists began to look for a real meat substitute.  It had a creamy fatty texture that could easily be translated into something meatier. The fear-mongering urban myth says that the avocado was modified using maggot DNA but everyone knows that it was actually Tenebrio molitor and bovine DNA. The end result being a moist succulent flavorsome meat analog. When they first hit the market you had people (usually dressed as Rosie de Avocado) demonstrating how to prepare the avocado steak.  Silly, but fun! No one will ever forget the red and green holograms!

How to prepare an avocado steak

1.                    Rub off any remaining brown husk. Be sure to fully wash the outer layer, removing any hairs or other stray bits. If not already removed, remove vestigial legs by pinch them as close to skin as possible.

2.                    Place the avocado steak fruit lengthwise on a secure surface.(Hint: Place a rubber mat on your counter or cutting board to prevent slipping.)

3.                    Hold the avocado securely with one hand, the softer belly of the avocado steak facing upward. Twist neckbulb until it can easily be pulled from the belly (You can get your dealer to do this)..

4.                    Slice slowly down the belly lengthwise around the tubercle, or ‘seed’, starting at the narrower neckbulb end.

5.                    Holding the avocado steak in the palm of one hand, use your other hand to twist and rotate the two halves apart.  Do this easily as the steak might slip away from the outer skin easily if it is very ripe.

6.                      Remove any excess fat from the belly, as this is excellent when used to saute the steak.

7.                    Remove the tubercle, or ‘seed’ (or leave it in if you plan to store one half) by slipping a spoon between the seed and steak. Gently work the tubercle, or ‘seed’, out - taking away as much of the lining as possible (the lining becomes nothing more than tough gristle when cooked).

8.                    For ripe avocado steaks, the outer skin or peel is easy to remove. Simply slice the avocado steak in half or cut into wedges.. Then grasp the outer dark layer or skin and pull it away from the inner red flesh of the steak. If some of the darker almost black portions of the skin remain on the red flesh of the steak, simply cut them away. The yellow to red portions of the avocado steak are what you want. Most people prefer a dark orange-red flesh. Do not consume the outer skin.

9.                    Cook your avocado steak through and until the internal temperature reaches 170°F.  Well-cooked avocado steaks are a medium gray (Hint: a proprietary browning liquid can be purchased from most avocado steak dealers.)

10.                When preparing avocado steaks, be careful to prevent cross-contamination by keeping your preparation area clean and separate from other foods such as meat, poultry, seafood, fruits, vegetables or nuts. Be mindful of other foods and surfaces they may come in contact with.  Genetic contamination can also create rogue genetic material on your kitchen surfaces. (Note: All genetic material derived from avocado steaks, present and future, is solely owned by American Biotech Consortium.)           

Avocado steak is excellent when prepared with Fun-tatoesâ, which give you that authentic meat-and-potato experience.  Adding Air-Carrotsâ creates a delightful “potted roast” dish.

Personal note:  My kids still sing the “Rosie de Avocado” song from the HOLO-NET, while dancing the “BBQ Shuffle”.

Rosie de Avocado Song

I’z Rosie de Avocado,

And kidz, here’s my motto,

 A day without a steak,

Izza pure heartache,

So hold out yer plate

And have an avocado steak

(everybody then rubs their belly and shouts "GMO-IS-O-SO-GOOD!")
ãAmerican Biotech Consortium, 2031

NEXT WEEK'S BLOG: Chicken Fingers and Scorpion Cabbage: Not just for Halloween anymore

Are GMOs Really Safe?

            We all have our self-interests, and nobody wants to do harm themselves.  If you ask a cattleman to name the best, most nutritious food, he’ll probably tell you ‘beef’; ask the same thing to a shepherd, you probably hear the word ‘lamb’.   The nutritional facts don’t come into play, they ultimately want to sell you something.  A pig farmer would never hand out scientific studies saying bacon is bad for you; you’re more likely to him croon about how his lovely grandmother made his grandfather a bacon-and-eggs breakfast everyday for 75 years and ‘gramps’ lived to be 95.  Of course, they will have their own studies, stories, and opinions; but it’s still about the bottom line.  So why would we expect no less from the big bio-tech companies, like Monsanto, when they to convince us that genetically modified organisms (GMOs) are safe for humans.
       An article in 2011 in the journal Food Policy said, “In a study involving 94 articles selected through objective criteria, it was found that the existence of either financial or professional conflict of interest was associated [with] study outcomes that cast genetically modified products in a favourable light.”1  Approval of GMOs has been based solely on numerous studies provided exclusively by the companies that would benefit from their sale and manufacture.  Corporate safety studies should not be considered the most reliable sources, as seen with tobacco industry studies which cast doubt and which stirred controversy on the negative health effects of smoking, not to mention delaying governmental regulation.
       Why won’t the companies that create GMOs push for more independent studies, since they consider them to be safe? Several independent studies to be published were blocked by GMO seed companies when the results were considered “unflattering,” according to Scientific American, even though they had been approved prior by the said companies.2  Independent studies cite the problems of getting plant samples to test due to restrictive end-user agreements imposed to protect GMO companies' intellectual property rights. Cornell University's Elson Shields submitted a statement to the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) that stated, "as a result of restrictive access, no truly independent research can be legally conducted on many critical questions regarding the technology".3
       The fact is that genetic engineering as a scientific discipline is still relatively new, only about 40 years old. Until the Human Genome Project in 2002, scientists believed that one gene carried the directions for making one protein (based on an antiquated one gene/one protein hypothesis from 1941).  Now scientists understand that one gene codes more than one protein and that abnormal proteins can be created.  Institut Européen de Chimie et Biologie (European Institute of Chemistry and Biology) says that scientists estimate that 70% of our genes code for at least 4 proteins each.  The damage caused in the creation of genetically modified organisms could be the mutation and differentiation of 2-4% of the DNA of the organism.  These mutations could be proteins that are allergenic, carcinogenic, or toxic. However, companies creating GMOs assert that when they do it one gene will only produce the one intended protein, behaving in the “precise and controlled way” they expect. It would be more correct to say in the “precise and controlled way” their investors expect.
       But do GMOs really behave according to Monsanto's, or other biotech's, corporate rules?
Researchers at the York Laboratory in the UK in 1999 were concerned that reactions to soy had skyrocketed by 50% over the previous year.  John Graham, spokesman for the lab, said, “We believe this raises serious new questions about the safety of GM foods." The soy used in the study was mainly GM; GM soy had recently entered the UK through US imports.4 A GMO food additive caused 37 deaths and a multitude of injuries by causing an Eosinophilia Myalgia Syndrome (EMS) epidemic in the United States.  Mice fed genetically modified corn have showed changes in testicular cells.  Rats fed genetically modified soy have showed major changes in their blood, liver, and kidneys.5  The World Health Organization states very clearly that “all genetically modified foods should be assessed before being allowed on the market.”6
       GMOs are a failed technology that only benefits the corporations that manufacture and sale them.  These corporations have tried to repeatedly to assure us to the safety of GMOs with one hand while demanding cash with the other.  I am not so easily deceived.

1.Food Policy. 2011; 36: 197–203
2.Scientific American 301(2) 22, August 2009
3.Bruce Stutz (1 July 2010). "Wanted: GM Seeds for Study". Seed Magazine.
4 http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2010/07/08/genetically-engineered-soybeans-may-cause-allergies.aspx
5 http://www.who.int/topics/food_genetically_modified/en/
6 http://www.responsibletechnology.org/gmo-dangers/65-health-risks/1notes

GMO Myths and Truths - Click here!

Helen Keller's Letter to German Students in 1933

Helen Keller

Helen Keller was born on June 27, 1880 in the small town of Tuscumbia, Alabama.  In 1882 when she was 18 months old, she fell ill and was struck blind, deaf and mute. Beginning in 1887, she made incredible progress with her ability to communicate with the help of her teacher, Anne Sullivan. Keller went on to college, graduating in 1904. She was the first deafblind person to earn a Bachelor of Arts degree.  In 1915 she founded, with George Kessler, the Helen Keller International (HKI) organization, which is devoted to research in vision, health and nutrition. In 1920, Keller helped found the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU).  She became a world-renowned author and speaker.  She was a radical in her time - a socialist, a pacifist, a women’s rights activist, an early supporter of the NAACP, and an advocate for free availability of birth control. She was honored with the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1964.  She was inducted into the Alabama Women's Hall of Fame in 1971.

For more information about the Helen Keller International organization, click here.

Americans learned in May 1933 that students in German universities planned to burn a long list of books deemed “un-German.” Finding out her books were among those to be burned, Helen Keller wrote this open letter to the students.

Transcript of letter, as it was published by the Associated Press on May 9, 1933:

"To the student body of Germany:

History has taught you nothing if you think you can kill ideas. Tyrants have tried to do that often before, and the ideas have risen up in their might and destroyed them.

You can burn my books and the books of the best minds in Europe, but the ideas in them have seeped through a million channels and will continue to quicken other minds. I gave all the royalties of my books for all time to the German soldiers blinded in the World War with no thought in my heart but love and compassion for the German people.

I acknowledge the grievous complications that have led to your intolerance; all the more do I deplore the injustice and unwisdom of passing on to unborn generations the stigma of your deeds.

Do not imagine that your barbarities to the Jews are unknown here. God sleepeth not, and He will visit His judgment upon you. Better were it for you to have a mill-stone hung around your neck and sink into the sea than to be hated and despised of all men.

                                                                                               Helen Keller"

Click here to see an image of a first draft of the letter, with written annotations

Click to view more of Helen Keller's letter at the American Foundation for the Blind website 

The Jefferson Bible

  

A popular philosophy widely accepted by the intellectuals of colonial America at the time of the American Revolution was deism.  Deism is the belief that, although the universe had a Creator, He does not concern Himself with the daily lives of humans and He does not directly communicate with humans.  They believed that the Creator allowed the universe to operate completely upon natural laws.  Deists also believed that human reason was the best means to solve social and political problems of the time. George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, Ethan Allen, James Madison, Thomas Paine and James Monroe were all followers of the philosophy.  Deists were not atheists, but I wouldn't say they were fundamentalist Christians either.  I believe that we really can’t know a person’s inner religious convictions; we can only decipher their beliefs by their actions and works.  By presenting the Jefferson Bible, I don’t want to convince you of what were Jefferson’s beliefs; I want to present you with the fact of something he himself created and let you make your own decisions.

“Done with his official work for the day, Thomas Jefferson sat in the new presidential mansion in Washington in 1803 and opened his Bible--not to pray, but to cut. He scoured the text for Jesus' greatest teachings, sliced out his favourite portions, and glued them into an empty volume. He called it ‘The Philosophy of Jesus.’ That book was lost to history.

In 1819, he started over and created a new version called ‘The Life and Morals of Jesus of Nazareth,’ commonly referred to now as the Jefferson Bible. This volume was kept largely secret and passed among Jefferson's relatives until 1895, when it was discovered by the librarian at the Smithsonian. In 1904, it was published by Congress."*

You’ll discover in reading it that Jefferson completely cut out miracles and signs or declarations of Jesus' divinity. 

Thomas Jefferson by Rembrandt Peale, 1800

The Life and Morals of Jesus of Nazareth 
Extracted Textually from the Gospels 
Greek, Latin, French, and English

Thomas Jefferson, 1819

Christ's Birth through The Twelve Apostles 

Luke 2

The Roman empire taxed. 
1: And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed. 
2: (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.) 
3: And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city. 
4: And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:) 
5: To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child. 
6: And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered. 
7: And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.   

21: And when eight days were accomplished for the circumcising of the child, his name was called JESUS. 
39: And when they had performed all things according to the law of the Lord, they returned into Galilee, to their own city Nazareth. 
40: And the child grew, and waxed strong in spirit, filled with wisdom: and the grace of God was upon him. 
42: And when he was twelve years old, they went up to Jerusalem, after the custom of the feast. 
43: And when they had fulfilled the days, as they returned, the child Jesus tarried behind in Jerusalem; and Joseph and his mother knew not of it. 
44: But they, supposing him to have been in the company, went a day's journey; and they sought him among their kinsfolk and acquaintances. 
45: And when they found him not, they turned back again to Jerusalem, seeking him. 
46: And it came to pass, that after three days they found him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the doctors, both hearing them, and asking them questions. 
47: And all that heard him were astonished at his understanding and answers. 
48: And when they saw him, they were amazed: and his mother said unto him, Son, why hast thou thus dealt with us? behold, thy father and I have sought thee sorrowing.   
51: And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject unto them. 
52: And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature. 

Luke 3 
1: Now in the fifteenth year of the reign of Tiberius Caesar, Pontius Pilate being governor of Judaea, and Herod being tetrarch of Galilee, and his brother Philip tetrarch of Ituraea and of the region of Trachonitis, and Lysanias the tetrarch of Abilene, 
2: Annas and Caiaphas being the high priests, 

Mark 1 
4: John did baptize in the wilderness. 

Matthew 3 
4: And the same John had his raiment of camel's hair, and a leathern girdle about his loins; and his meat was locusts and wild honey. 
5: Then went out to him Jerusalem, and all Judaea, and all the region round about Jordan, 
6: And were baptized of him in Jordan.   
13: Then cometh Jesus from Galilee to Jordan unto John, to be baptized of him. 

Luke 3 
23: And Jesus himself began to be about thirty years of age.  

John 2  
12: After this he went down to Capernaum, he, and his mother, and his brethren, and his disciples: and they continued there not many days. 
13: And the Jews' passover was at hand, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. 
14: And found in the temple those that sold oxen and sheep and doves, and the changers of money sitting: 
15: And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables; 
16: And said unto them that sold doves, Take these things hence; make not my Father's house an house of merchandise.

John 3 
  
22: After these things came Jesus and his disciples into the land of Judaea; and there he tarried with them, and baptized. 

Matthew 4 
12: Now when Jesus had heard that John was cast into prison, he departed into Galilee; 

Mark 6 
17: For Herod himself had sent forth and laid hold upon John, and bound him in prison for Herodias' sake, his brother Philip's wife: for he had married her. 
18: For John had said unto Herod, It is not lawful for thee to have thy brother's wife. 
19: Therefore Herodias had a quarrel against him, and would have killed him; but she could not: 
20: For Herod feared John, knowing that he was a just man and an holy, and observed him; and when he heard him, he did many things, and heard him gladly. 
21: And when a convenient day was come, that Herod on his birthday made a supper to his lords, high captains, and chief estates of Galilee; 
22: And when the daughter of the said Herodias came in, and danced, and pleased Herod and them that sat with him, the king said unto the damsel, Ask of me whatsoever thou wilt, and I will give it thee.
23: And he sware unto her, Whatsoever thou shalt ask of me, I will give it thee, unto the half of my kingdom. 

24: And she went forth, and said unto her mother, What shall I ask? And she said, The head of John the Baptist. 
25: And she came in immediately with haste unto the king, and asked, saying, I will that thou give me by and by in a charger the head of John the Baptist. 
26: And the king was exceeding sorry; yet for his oath's sake, and for their sakes which sat with him, he would not reject her. 
27: And immediately the king sent an executioner, and commanded his head to be brought: and he went and beheaded him in the prison, 
28: And brought his head in a charger, and gave it to the damsel: and the damsel gave it to her mother. 

Mark 1 
21: And they went into Capernaum; and straightway on the sabbath day he entered into the synagogue, and taught. 
22: And they were astonished at his doctrine: for he taught them as one that had authority, and not as the scribes. 

Matthew 12 
1: At that time Jesus went on the sabbath day through the corn; and his disciples were an hungred, and began to pluck the ears of corn and to eat. 
2: But when the Pharisees saw it, they said unto him, Behold, thy disciples do that which is not lawful to do upon the sabbath day. 
3: But he said unto them, Have ye not read what David did, when he was an hungred, and they that were with him; 
4: How he entered into the house of God, and did eat the shewbread, which was not lawful for him to eat, neither for them which were with him, but only for the priests? 
5: Or have ye not read in the law, how that on the sabbath days the priests in the temple profane the sabbath, and are blameless?   
9: And when he was departed thence, he went into their synagogue: 
10: And, behold, there was a man which had his hand withered. And they asked him, saying, Is it lawful to heal on the sabbath days? that they might accuse him. 
11: And he said unto them, What man shall there be among you, that shall have one sheep, and if it fall into a pit on the sabbath day, will he not lay hold on it, and lift it out? 
12: How much then is a man better than a sheep? Wherefore it is lawful to do well on the sabbath days. 

Mark 2 
27: And he said unto them, The sabbath was made for man, and not man for the sabbath. 

Matthew 12 
14: Then the Pharisees went out, and held a council against him, how they might destroy him. 
15: But when Jesus knew it, he withdrew himself from thence: and great multitudes followed him. 

Luke 6 
12: And it came to pass in those days, that he went out into a mountain to pray, and continued all night in prayer to God. 
13: And when it was day, he called unto him his disciples: and of them he chose twelve, whom also he named apostles; 
14: Simon, (whom he also named Peter,) and Andrew his brother, James and John, Philip and Bartholomew, 
15: Matthew and Thomas, James the son of Alphaeus, and Simon called Zealotes, 
16: And Judas the brother of James, and Judas Iscariot, which also was the traitor. 
17: And he came down with them, and stood in the plain, and the company of his disciples, and a great multitude of people out of all Judaea and Jerusalem, and from the sea coast of Tyre and Sidon, which came to hear him. 

Beatitudes - The Sinful Woman

Matthew 5 
1: And seeing the multitudes, he went up into a mountain: and when he was set, his disciples came unto him: 
2: And he opened his mouth, and taught them, saying, 
3: Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 
4: Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted. 
5: Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth. 
6: Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled. 
7: Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy. 
8: Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God. 
9: Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. 
10: Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 
11: Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. 
12: Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you. 

Luke 6 
24: But woe unto you that are rich! for ye have received your consolation. 
25: Woe unto you that are full! for ye shall hunger. Woe unto you that laugh now! for ye shall mourn and weep. 
26: Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you! for so did their fathers to the false prophets. 

Matthew 5 
13: Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men. 
14: Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. 
15: Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. 
16: Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven. 
17: Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil. 
18: For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled. 
19: Whosoever therefore shall break one of these least commandments, and shall teach men so, he shall be called the least in the kingdom of heaven: but whosoever shall do and teach them, the same shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven. 
20: For I say unto you, That except your righteousness shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven. 
21: Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment: 
22: But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. 
23: Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; 
24: Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift. 
25: Agree with thine adversary quickly, whiles thou art in the way with him; lest at any time the adversary deliver thee to the judge, and the judge deliver thee to the officer, and thou be cast into prison. 
26: Verily I say unto thee, Thou shalt by no means come out thence, till thou hast paid the uttermost farthing. 
27: Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: 
28: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. 
29: And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. 
30: And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. 
31: It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: 
32: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery. 
33: Again, ye have heard that it hath been said by them of old time, Thou shalt not forswear thyself, but shalt perform unto the Lord thine oaths: 
34: But I say unto you, Swear not at all; neither by heaven; for it is God's throne: 
35: Nor by the earth; for it is his ?footstool: neither by Jerusalem; for it is the city of the great King. 
36: Neither shalt thou swear by thy head, because thou canst not make one hair white or black. 
37: But let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil. 
38: Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth: 
39: But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also. 
40: And if any man will sue thee at the law, and take away thy coat, let him have thy cloak also. 
41: And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain. 
42: Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away. 
43: Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy. 
44: But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them that despitefully use you, and persecute you; 
45: That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust. 
46: For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same? 
47: And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? do not even the publicans so? 

Luke 6 
34: And if ye lend to them of whom ye hope to receive, what thank have ye? for sinners also lend to sinners, to receive as much again. 
35: But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil. 
36: Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful. 

Matthew 6 
1: Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven.
2: Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. 
3: But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: 
4: That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret hinself shall reward thee openly. 
5: And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. 
6: But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly. 
7: But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking. 
8: Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him. 
9: After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. 
10: Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. 
11: Give us this day our daily bread. 
12: And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. 
13: And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen. 
14: For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: 
15: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. 
16: Moreover when ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. 
17: But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face;
18: That thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father, which seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly. 
19: Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: 
20: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: 
21: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. 
22: The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light. 
23: But if thine eye be evil, thy whole body shall be full of darkness. If therefore the light that is in thee be darkness, how great is that darkness! 
24: No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon. 
25: Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? 
26: Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they? 
27: Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit to his stature? 
28: And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin: 
29: And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 
30: Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith? 
31: Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? 
32: (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. 
33: But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. 
34: Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. 

Matthew 7 
1: Judge not, that ye be not judged. 
2: For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. 

Luke 6 
38: Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. 

Matthew 7 
3: And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? 
4: Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? 
5: Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye. 
6: Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you. 
7: Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: 
8: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. 
9: Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? 
10: Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? 
11: If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him? 
12: Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets. 
13: Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: 
14: Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it. 
15: Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. 
16: Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? 
17: Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. 
18: A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. 
19: Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. 
20: Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them. 

Matthew 12 
35: A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things. 
36: But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment. 
37: For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned. 

Matthew 7 
24: Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock: 
25: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock. 
26: And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand: 
27: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.
28: And it came to pass, when Jesus had ended these sayings, the people were astonished at his doctrine: 
29: For he taught them as one having authority, and not as the scribes. 

Matthew 8 
1 When he was come down from the mountain, great multitudes followed him.   

Matthew 6 
6: And he went round about the villages, teaching. 

Matthew 11 
28: Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 
29: Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. 
30: For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. 

Luke 7 
36: And one of the Pharisees desired him that he would eat with him. And he went into the Pharisee's house, and sat down to meat. 
37: And, behold, a woman in the city, which was a sinner, when she knew that Jesus sat at meat in the Pharisee's house, brought an alabaster box of ointment, 
38: And stood at his feet behind him weeping, and began to wash his feet with tears, and did wipe them with the hairs of her head, and kissed his feet, and anointed them with the ointment. 
39: Now when the Pharisee which had bidden him saw it, he spake within himself, saying, This man, if he were a prophet, would have known who and what manner of woman this is that toucheth him: for she is a sinner. 
40: And Jesus answering said unto him, Simon, I have somewhat to say unto thee. And he saith, Master, say on. 
41: There was a certain creditor which had two debtors: the one owed five hundred pence, and the other fifty. 
42: And when they had nothing to pay, he frankly forgave them both. Tell me therefore, which of them will love him most? 
43: Simon answered and said, I suppose that he, to whom he forgave most. And he said unto him, Thou hast rightly judged. 
44: And he turned to the woman, and said unto Simon, Seest thou this woman? I entered into thine house, thou gavest me no water for my feet: but she hath washed my feet with tears, and wiped them with the hairs of her head. 
45: Thou gavest me no kiss: but this woman since the time I came in hath not ceased to kiss my feet. 
46: My head with oil thou didst not anoint: but this woman hath anointed my feet with ointment.   

Mark 3 
31: There came then his brethren and his mother, and, standing without, sent unto him, calling him. 
32: And the multitude sat about him, and they said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren without seek for thee. 
33: And he answered them, saying, Who is my mother, or my brethren? 
34: And he looked round about on them which sat about him, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren! 
35: For whosoever shall do the will of God, the same is my brother, and my sister, and mother. 

For the complete Jefferson Bible, as well as more information and resources, click here.

* http://www.beliefnet.com/resourcelib